Disregard the hair. Note the sign. Where are counterfeiters laundering their Benjamins these days? Dumpy ice cream shops at outlet malls in Woodburn, Oregon, apparently.

DW: Why don't you take anything bigger than a $20?

Server: We get a lot of counterfeits here.

DW: No S**t?!

Server: Really. Not that I would know if I was holding a fake or not.

DW: Therein lies the rub.

AuthorDavid Wolman